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Are you angry a lot of the time? Many people learn to react angrily to life on life’s terms because they haven’t developed alternative coping skills. Some people blame others for their anger and avoid taking control of it and learning how to cope with it. It can be a toxic emotion if you haven’t learned how to deal with it. Being always angry is also a symptom of depression. It’s hard to have the right attitude in recovery when everything in your head is negative.
If the above description reminds you of yourself, it’s time to shift your attitude. Just like anyone, you can change your attitude and learn to let go of anger.
Owning your anger is an important part of coping. It’s okay to feel your feelings, but you don’t have to act angry when you feel mad. “They make me angry” is something a lot of people tell themselves. Not everyone is a mind reader, and not everyone lives to do your bidding! If you’re angry, it’s because there’s some hurt inside of you.
You may be angry because your feelings were hurt, or because a situation reminds you of something in life that has happened before. Either way, the anger is yours and yours alone. Blaming others for your emotions isn’t healthy. Think about why you feel angry – what triggered you? Did you have a bad day? Were you frustrated because you were stuck in traffic? Did you feel embarrassed about something?
There is always emotion behind your anger, and much of the time, it’s something deep inside of you that you haven’t ever examined before.
Instead of telling somebody off, flying into a rage, or punching a wall, take ten minutes when you’re angry. Here are a few things to try next time you’re mad:
As you can see, there are a lot of easy ways to get “out of” your angry head and begin to cool off. When you’re less inflamed, you can start to examine the reasons for your anger and a better way to approach your anger next time you’re feeling it.
Remember that recovery is about progress, not perfection. It’s the little things that help you build new patterns and make changes. Try to let go of your anger one day at a time.
Recovery is a process, and many people like the idea of transitioning to the “real world” after treatment. Living with other people who have the same goals, in a safe and hopeful environment, can help you stay focused on yourself and your recovery. Learn more about your options by calling us at 760-216-2077.
Choosing a sponsor is one of the most important things to do when you start on your recovery journey. While you’re in treatment, you’ll begin to connect with others in recovery. Selecting your sponsor can be challenging when you’re in a treatment environment. After all, you are usually limited by the AA and NA meetings you choose to attend.
The good news is that it’s not a big deal if you change sponsors. If you’ve outgrown your sponsor or have trouble getting ahold of them, it’s time to consider a new person.
Whether you’re choosing a sponsor for the first time or selecting a new one, here is some guidance for choosing a sponsor.
Choosing a sponsor can be scary at first. Opening up to others in recovery helps you change your life and begin healing. In recovery rooms, you’re often told to “take what you need and leave the rest.” If you don’t feel supported by your sponsor, or you think that you need to switch, don’t worry. People in recovery change sponsors for many reasons. Your recovery is about you and your own needs.
Sober living homes can be an important step in transitioning back to the “real world” after treatment. Living in a recovery home helps you focus on yourself and your recovery in a supportive environment.
Learn more about your options by calling us at 760-216-2077.
There are a lot of temptations in recovery. It’s recommended that people with substance use disorders avoid old people, places and things. These are simple ways to avoid a relapse. Old people may tempt you to use, hanging out with people who use alcohol and drugs, and old habits can trap you in a cycle of addictive behavior that leads to relapse. One of the biggest triggers, however, is one that’s rarely spoken of; boredom.
When you first started using your drug of choice, you probably were doing it recreationally. If you bored, sad, angry or happy, as time went on, you used to “enjoy yourself” and “relax”. Addiction will give you any and all excuses to get high. Boredom was probably a big trigger. Whether you used to get away from yourself, relax, or stop thinking about your problems, boredom was probably a part of all of those feelings.
Boredom can lead to complacency, depression, and loneliness. If you’re bored, you’re not working on your recovery or you don’t want to. Your thoughts may start to drift toward the “good old times” – times when you felt like your drug use was fun and under control. It’s easy to see how this can lead to a relapse.
Remember: you have a substance use disorder. It is a lifelong and chronic disease. Your brain wants to trick you into using, and it will tell you whatever lies you want to hear.
If you’re bored in recovery, that usually means something is missing. Here are a few things to think about:
Boredom is something that everyone experiences, but people in recovery are particularly suspeptible to its effects. Keep your focus on your goals and the good things in life; this too shall pass. Working on your recovery program and making time for your favorite things will help keep you grounded.
At By The Sea Recovery, we offer the highest sober living standards. With healthy structure, sober living culture and above all safety, we provide a space for everyone to heal and continue their recovery journey. Get in touch with us at 760-216-2077.
Many people in recovery, especially when they first get clean, feel depressed, lonely or “down” every once in a while. A person with addiction has a lot of loss to mourn when they first clean. If you’re afraid, angry, or sad, you’re not alone. Depression is also something you may experience as you gain your footing in your new life in recovery.
Feeling sad or depressed is normal for many people, especially when you’re first getting clean. Many of the emotions that you feel are normal and will pass as you start to process them. You may feel like you’re in mourning for your old life. That’s normal, too. Many people grieve their own lives but start to feel better once they begin to rebuild their life in recovery.
Working the 12 steps, going to meetings, and making friends with other people in recovery will help you learn to work through your emotions. Sharing your feelings with others will often help you lessen their impact.
Feeling sad, let down, or blue is one of these feelings. You may feel like you’re holding on by a thread some days, while other days you’re full of hope and energy. In most cases, these feelings will pass. You’ll experience many emotions when you’re clean and sober, and learn how to cope with them.
If you wake up depressed and go to bed depressed, for weeks on end, there may be something else going on. Depression can also be a symptom of a mental health disorder. If you feel like hurting yourself, wish you were dead, or have other deep, sad feelings that seem like they’ve been going on forever, it’s time to get help. Any depressive symptoms that seem to stop you from working on goals, or make you feel hopeless are warning signs that you need to get help.
Getting help for depression is important. Depression can be a disease, and like any disease, especially addiction, the only way to get better is to seek out help. If you’re comfortable, ask people in your support group to help you. A psychiatrist, therapist, or treatment professional can help you with resources. Like all of recovery, you’re not alone. There are many people in recovery who are also recovering from a mental disorder.
Remember that in recovery, you’re never alone.
If you’re struggling with a mental health disorder, or just want extra support, sober housing is an option many people choose to help make the transition to life without the use of drugs.
Sober housing is a great way to make new friends and start adding inspiration and empowerment to your life. Learn more about your options for serene sober living at 760-216-2077.
Exercise is a powerful tool that anyone can use to help improve their lives. It can help improve your mood and regulate your blood pressure.
When you were using drugs, you may have gotten some exercise. Getting, finding and using drugs and alcohol sometimes means spending some time on your feet.
Once you’ve been clean and sober for a while, you’ll notice some subtle changes in your life. You may feel more confident or upbeat. Or, you may feel more depressive or anxious without the drugs you used to use when you wanted to self-medicate.
Studies show that exercise is a powerful tool for people that suffer from depressive symptoms. For some people who are moderately depressed, exercise is enough to help alleviate their symptoms.
Many people with depression either have trouble sleeping or sleep too much. Exercise can help you sleep more soundly at night and even help you with a boost of energy. People who suffer from severe depression usually require medication and talk therapy. Exercise can be a form of self-care when you’re feeling up to it. Joining a walking group, going surfing, going for a hike or bike ride are all ways to make exercise a part of your regular life.
The Anxiety and Depression Association of America says that nearly 40% of Americans have anxiety disorders. Many people in recovery have experienced trauma or have been diagnosed with mental health disorders such as Generalized Anxiety Disorder or Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.
Exercise can help with anxiety in a few ways. Exercise releases endorphins, the feel-good hormone that the body makes naturally. Walking is a way to practice mindfulness or deep breathing. Surfing may make you feel closer to your spiritual side. These are all benefits of exercise in recovery.
If you’re angry, anxious, or depressed, please try a walk. Just 15 minutes a day can make a difference in your health and your mood. Give yourself a chance to use this powerful recovery tool.
We can help. By the Sea Recovery homes are supervised, structured environment that help men who are recovering from addiction transition to the next phase of their recovery journey. Please give us a call at 760-216-2077 to learn more about our housing.
Many people go to detox, then to long-term treatment, and return to their home once they have completed their treatment program. This may work for some people. For other people new to recovery, living in an environment full of new challenges, stressors, and old triggers sounds overwhelming. This is why so many people in recovery decide to transition from treatment to sober living.
If you’ve been away at an inpatient treatment center, the “outside world” can feel foreign to you. For months, you lived in a supportive network where everyone was working towards the same goals. You probably felt safer, saner, and more supported in treatment. It becomes an extended family for many people!
The truth of the matter is that people in recovery are your extended family. When you go to 12-step meetings, you find a sponsor, make friends, and share intimate details of your life.
Adapting to everyday life will be much different than living in a treatment center, of course. You’ll have to deal with people at work that aren’t in recovery. You’ll also have to learn to cope with triggers, new feelings, and other challenges.
It’s not surprising that many people choose to “take it slow” and transition back into their communities through a sober housing.
People in sober housing are in recovery, just like you. They all have their own lives and goals they are working towards.
Living with others in a sober environment keeps you away from temptation. You’ll also have the security of knowing that everyone in the environment is clean and sober and working a recovery program. You’ll still be able to focus on yourself and your own goals while you’re getting back on your feet.
Sober housing is a place to help you explore your new life in recovery. While living in the sober home, you’ll be able to work, go to meetings, therapy, family time, etc. but you’ll also have rules to abide by, such as curfews.
If you’re interested in learning more about sober housing, give us a call at 760-216-2077 to learn more about your options.
As a person in recovery from addiction, you’ve gone through a lot of struggles just to stay sober. It’s not easy to fight against a substance use disorder. Treatment and therapy can help you cope with the transition from addiction to recovery. But what about when you have to spend most of your time in the “real world”? Will you be able to return to your career, or find work at all when you’re newly clean and sober? This can be quite a challenge for some people. But it’s a fact of life that everyone needs to have money to cover life expenses, such as shelter, food and other necessities.
A lot of people in recovery feel they must explain gaps in employment on their resume. After all, you may have quit a job and gone on a bender, or simply remained unemployed for months or years because your addiction was in control. When addiction is control, a person may steal, show up late or not at all, or otherwise exercise poor judgement that leaves them unemployed.
A poor work history isn’t something that you can gloss over. If you want to resume a career and have a troubled work history, you may have to humble yourself with a job that pays your bills even if it isn’t your dream job.
It’s best to be honest about any mental health issues and your addiction/recovery up front. While you may feel there is stigma attached to your recovery, honesty is always best when you’re starting a new relationship with a potential employer.
Nowadays almost every employer does a background check when choosing who to hire. You should be prepared to admit this upfront and explain the ways you have made amends.
It’s true that if you have history of drug or alcohol-related offenses, you’re less likely to be offered interviews or a job. Be honest about your struggles and explain how you’re overcoming them.
We all live in the real world where it’s important to be realistic. If you need a job to pay the bills, then you need to humble yourself and take a job even if it’s not in your chosen field.
You can work a job while showing your dedication to the career you want. This means volunteering, getting more education, and working on getting a significant amount of sober time.
If you can’t find the job you want, or you keep getting turned down, it’s time for you to consider upgrading your skills. It’s important that you stay sober and always make that priority. If you stay sober, and continue to work, future employers will see your dedication and stability.
There are hundreds of free classes with certificates you can use to improve your resume while working a job outside of your field. Try classes from Alison.com or Coursera. Most of them are free!
Of course, asking around at 12-step meetings for job leads, guidance or other help can give you a leg up when it comes to job hunting. Never be afraid to ask for help, you’ll one day be able to pay it forward.
Are you looking for some extra support or a way to live with your recovering peers? Consider sober homes. Living with others who have similar goals can help you stay focused and safe from triggers. Give us a call at 760-216-2077 to learn more about your options.
Do you ever have butterflies in your stomach or feel your pulse quicken when you think of something you’re scared to do? Many people in recovery experience anxiety in recovery, but it may be difficult for you to deal with in your first few years. Let’s take a look at what anxiety is and how you can cope with it in a healthy way.
Anxiety is an emotion that’s perfectly normal, even for people who don’t have a substance use disorder. When you’re feeling afraid of an event or situation, it causes your body to flood with adrenaline. You may shake, feel your face flushing or your stomach tighten, or even feel like you’re breathing too fast or can’t breath enough air. (This last symptom is considered to be an anxiety attack.)
Anxiety is the body’s reaction to what it deciphers as immenent danger. The way the body responds to the fear of this danger is to initiate what is called a “fight of flight” response. This response dates back to our ancestors, who often had to make split-second decisions to survive the many dangers of the world. The body gave them two decisions; fight or flight. This adrenaline rush helped them when they decided between these two things.
Today, your body may activate the fight or flight response even if there isn’t imminen danger. Your mind may then feel like the danger is greater than it is, which can cause a lot of fear even if you’re not in any physical danger.
A lot of people find that their anxiety is less when they share it with others, such as a therapist, sponsor or good friend. If you’re having anxiety attacks, you may want to seek professional help to get your anxiety under control. When anxiety causes you to miss out on things in life, it’s time to get help to get it under control.
Anxiety that doesn’t cause panic attacks can be managed more easily. You may want to role-play situations that make you anxious with a trusted friend or therapist. When you feel anxious, a brisk walk or a long bath may calm your nerves. Getting regular exercise and going to 12-step meetings can help you, too. Find something you love to do and do it when you’re feeling stressed. Often, self-care can be the answer to feeling anxious.
Self-care such as meditation, journaling, exercise or just reading a book can help you stay calm in your daily life. Remember that if you’re anxious, this too shall pass. Using self-care to help this feeling pass more quickly.
A lot of people in sobriety have fears about returning to the “real world” after treatment. Living with other people who have the same goals can help quell your anxiety and gain confidence when you’re new to recovery. Learn more about your sober living options and how we can help by calling us at 760-216-2077.
Long-term treatment takes an addicted person out of their normal environment to allow them to concentrate on themselves. When a person in recovery returns home, there is a lot of responsibility waiting for them. Bills, expenses, and debt that may have piled up during active addiction are a few things that might wait for you if you’re coming home from treatment. All of these things require you to get a job and/or resume a work life when you’re ready and able. How can you make sure that your job or career don’t overwhelm you?
One of the most common themes among people in recovery who return to work is learning to cope with stress. Many workplaces, especially on the West Coast, are high-paced and come with a good amount of stress. You can manage this! Jobs are always going to have stress, so it’s up to you to learn how to cope.
Learning self-care is important in early recovery, and using to combat stress is important. This means you may need to go for a long walk during your lunch break, or head out to surf while the sun is still up and you’re done with your day. Other forms of self-care include taking a long bath, learning to meditate or practicing breathing exercises. Breathing exercises and meditation are both things you can use throughout your day. Youtube has a lot of great videos when it comes to learning these coping techniques, but you might ask a counselor or peer what works for them.
Having a good attitude is a key to success in the work world and beyond. If you’re in your feelings at work, make sure to take time out to say the serenity prayer or write a gratitude list. Think of five things you’re grateful for each day, whether you’re happy about quick commute, a good lunch, or the empathy of coworkers.
If work begins stressing you out, talk to your sponsor or share at a meeting. Plan your meetings before or after work to help you deal with the stressful times.
Sober living and aftercare programs can help you transition back to everyday life, giving you the extra support you need while making decisions about your future and strengthening your recovery. Get in touch to learn more about your options by calling us at 760-216-2011.
For many people with substance use disorder, detox is a part of their story. When the body becomes dependent on a substance, a person who is addicted feels many side effects, such as headaches, sweating, tremors, or even fever. Withdrawal is one of the hardest parts of getting clean and sober, which is why detox is highly recommended. However, many people don’t know about another type of withdrawal that can affect you later on in recovery. This withdrawal, though often mild, is a synmptom of long-term adjustment to life without the use of alcohol or drugs. Withdrawal symptoms that take place many months after a person gets clean and sober fit under the umbrella of post-acute withdrawal symptoms.
Post-acute withdrawal is perfectly normal for people who used drugs for an extended period of time. Just like no one becomes addicted overnight, the body and brain can’t adjust overnight, either.
Post-acute withdrawal symptoms are believed by clinicians to be a sign that the body is starting to recover from the long-term damage caused by addiction. PAWS symptoms are very real, and may be confusing if you’re noticing them “out of nowhere”. Rest assured they, too, will pass. They can, however, last up to two years.
If you’re suffering from PAWS, you may experience anxiety, angry outburst or mood swings. You may also have “brain fog” or trouble thinking/concentrating, feel tired or overwhelmed. You might also experience some depression symptoms.
PAWS symptoms are milder and less severe than acute withdrawal symptoms. If they seem intense or severe or are getting in the way of normal life functions, please check in with a doctor or therapist for recommendations.
PAWS symptoms can seem to come out of nowhere, but that doesn’t mean you should dismiss them. If you’re having difficulty coping with them, reach out for help.
Do you or somebody you love have a need for outpatient treatment or aftercare? Are you looking for a sober living situation? Please call us today at 1-760-216-2077 to learn more about how our programs can help.
